But he never thought he'd find one day could change his life, and he's about to discover how wrong he is.
Because in a single day, he meets the man who looks to be the one, the love of his life. It's an improbable idea - a man who deals in death finding love - but it's like it's meant to be. That single day gets weirder and troubles pile up, forcing Ceaton to take a hard look at his dreary life and accept that one day can change everything, especially himself. His future might be brighter than he expects - if he can stay alive long enough to find out.
Episode XIII: Return of the Crack
Long, long ago in a galaxy far, far away... Okay, a couple of weeks ago in houses on opposite coasts of the US, but who's counting? Anyways, Red and I are back for another episode of Crack Time With Calmes (damn, we're chatty!) and let me tell you... the crack was strong in this one. We got our fix and are jonesing for more. Check it out!
Holy Crack! This was amazing. This was so damn good. It was packed with adventure, intrigue, murdering mobsters, crazy and hilarious banter, surprises aplenty and the oh so swoony “MINE” style of romance that makes me giddy AF for a Mary Calmes story.
There isn’t much I can say about this book without giving it away so maybe I’ll just give a few highlights of sorts.
Ceaton Mercer is fresh outta the Marines when he is offered a job to work for a Syrian Mob boss, Grigor Jankovic and why not take an opportunity when it presents itself? From there, we learn about Ceaton’s present and his past. He is a loyal man who trusts very few people outside of his current circle that includes men who become family and they have the best banter ever. Only true brothers can rib one another the way Ceaton and his boys do and it was so funny while being endearing as well.
There is some serious gun action in this book with as I mentioned, murder and all that comes with it. When chatting with JL about these scenes, we both likened them to Tarantino style movies where yes, you get the gruesome and bloody scenes but they are done with such a shrewd level of cinematic storytelling that you almost forget something like that would normally toss your cookies? You know? Like, the scene is so fecking brilliant, you roll with it and dance along with Mr. Blonde to Stealers Wheel while becoming cutting and handsy with Marvin’s ear… right? *grins*
Now, who but Mary Calmes would NOT reveal who the love interest of her MC would be in the blurb but leave you guessing? It was a tactical move I’m sure and it worked for this reader. I had a few guesses as to who it could be but when they show up? I was floored and ready for the romance to begin! Of course I wasn’t disappointed, I live for the style of romance the author writes. It never fails to excite me, to make me swoon and yeah, to grunt along with the possessive declarations that never come too soon. NEVER when it’s Mary Calmes.JL: Lol, the discussion between Marko and Ceaton over the merits of a mattress pad versus a rain poncho has given me a case of the giggles
Red: The bad ass murdering mobsters cracked me up. When they had the family talk and got all emotional? So funny and so awe inducing.
JL: OMG, their banter! Epic!
Red: I love it. She made murdering mobsters so comical but not stupid... Know what I mean? They are adorable AF even when they are doing deplorable things to very bad people.
JL: Yes, exactly! I keep thinking this reminds me of a movie. Something along the lines of Reservoir Dogs.. any Tarantino movie actually.
Red: Totally with the violence. It's gruesome but necessary like a Tarantino film. Also very well done so that you see what they are doing, the killing and torture but you are okay with it because how it's presented... Very smartly. Does that make sense?
JL: It makes perfect sense and she did it perfectly perfect. It was perfection.
Red: Ha. That's the review right there.
This book is what I am hoping a start to a new series. There is so much opportunity here to explore and so many things that need to be tied up and receive closure. I am ready for it, Ms. Calmes. Bring it on.Red: JHFC! What a brilliant woman Mary Calmes is. I JUST REALIZED we have no fucking clue who Ceaton's love interest is by the blurb. OMG! OMG! How fucking cool is that????
Red: Goodness she writes some emotional stuff, doesn't she? I just loved this! I love the take on mobsters being the good guys... kinda.This murdering foursome cracks me up! LOL“Okay, then,” I said, exhaling, letting the tension drain out of me. “I’ll try and not let all the murder get me down.”
JL: Aren't they all awesome? I'm so in love with this story.
Red: They are great. That murder/torture was gruesome AF but necessary. I wonder if [SPOILER] is the love interest? How far are you? Half way? Do you know who it is???? Don't tell me.
Red: “He was looking at you, Ceaton, and couldn’t do anything else.”GAH! I love this set up!!! I still have zero clue if [STILL A SPOILER] is Ceaton's love or not but I don't care. This is so much fun.AND WE HAVE A PEACOAT!!! *flails*
Let’s just get this out of the way…
There. Now you don’t have to wonder.JL: So, is Ceaton pronounced see-ton or Keaton?
Red: I'm going with Keaton
JL: And see, here I am calling him Seaton in my head. Lol
Red: Eh...you could always ask her. Love the thread name btw
JL: Mary just confirmed Ceaton is with a soft C like Seaton.
Red: I saw. Figures I'd be wrong considering I pronounced her last name wrong for ever and honestly still do.
JL: Lol, I've known how to pronounce her last name since 2013 yet I still say it like Calm-ez.
Oh the crack is strong in this one! Mary brought her A game, she’s here to conquer and she ain’t taking no prisoners. I loved this. No, that’s not right. I freaking adored this little story that popped up out of nowhere. So much crack! You’ve got your peacoats and your eyebrow waggles, your guns and violence, your over-the-top storyline and the longest flashback to ever flash, er… back. Mary went Old School on us I’m thinking Mary had me in mind when she wrote this. That could be a thing, right?
JL: This is so completely OTT and I love it! Leave it to Mary to make the bad guys so adorable.
Red: Kissing was a lost art with me; I had no interest, it took so much time. Fucking was about fast and dirty and hot and done.Oh he needs someone to prove him so wrong SO MANY TIMES!~
JL: That's about where I stopped. I'll pick it back up as soon as I get home. About an hour
Red: I am stopping soon and hate that I even have to but I get to close early today so I am outta here!BUT OMG! THIS IS SO FUCKING GOOD! I JUST WANT TO HUG THE CARP OUTTA MARY CALMES FOR THIS!!!!!
JL: Shit! *races to catch up*
Red: Take your time. I won't be able to read again until like 9 or 10pm my time tonight. BUT IT WILL KILL ME! LOL
JL: Starting chapter 5! Do I get to meet the love interstate now? [gotta love that autocorrect!]
Sara: Ummm... Maybe??? Be ready for serious crack... That's all I'm saying. It's more amazing, the second half is 10x better if that's believable. OMG. It's amazing.
JL: I spy with my little eye... a peacoat!
Red: I love that she puts them in there no matter what. Ack! I just love her to pieces. This book is crazy good
JL: There's tons of eyebrow waggles too. I'm such a sucker for the eyebrow waggle.
Red: I KNOW! When Ceaton meets his match be prepared to just grin and melt. It's amazing. Have I said that yet? My review is going to be me cheering and spelling Amazing. Gimme an A!!!!! LOL
While I love all the crazy that Mary put in this story, my favorite part was when we finally got to meet the love interest. Oh, he was just the most delectable surprise! The whole point of this book is what a difference a day can make in your life and, yes, you can fall in love at first sight. There is such a thing as insta-love. I’m living proof of that. My husband of 21 years and I moved in together the day we met.
Ceaton is blindsided by this at first unassuming person. Never in his life did he expect to fall head over heels for someone after knowing them for less than ten minutes. There’s no way anyone could keep his interest for longer than a one-off. He’s just not the type of guy who would ever settle down or put anyone else before himself.
And this guy? The one who steamrolled his way into Ceaton’s life and his heart? Well, let’s just say I’ve sewn a new pocket up on the tippy-top just for him.Until now. Until this. Until him.
“I know the best place to feed you and get you liquored up so we can come home and I can take advantage of you.”
He’s gonna have his man no matter what it takes. He’s not going to let a little thing like murder get in the way of his future.
“If I can keep you, I’m set, so I’m going to do my damndest to make that happen because I’m a good person and I deserve you.”
And fellow Calmes crack whores, get ready to have your mind blown at the end. Mary put the BIGGEST plot twist ever in the history of forever in this book. I was freaking stunned! You’re not gonna believe what she has in store for you. I was so amazed by the twist that I wanted to run in circles and shout from the rooftops, professing my love and adoration of The Goddess of Crack.JL: For whatever reason, the man had me good and bespelled.EEEEEEEEEEEE!
Red: [SPOILER] is pocket worthy AF!!!!!!!!
JL: “you and I need to make with the dating already.”I. Love. [WHATSISNAME]. So. Fucking. Much.
Red: Pock-et. Worth-yyyyyyy!!!He's adorable. Just wait. It gets better.
Red: I finished btw. I couldn't help it. It was so good and I want more.
JL: I'm gonna do my best to finish tonight. I'm just now leaving work. End of month is crazy!
JL: OMG, I just want to eat [NOT GOING TO SPOILER WHO IS THE LOVE INTEREST] up! I think I've highlighted everything he's said in chapter 5!
Red: Pocket worthy he is. I adore him. He's the best kept secret ever!!!!
JL: He is soooo pocket worthy! I love that he was kept a secret too. I'll be sure to redact his name from our chat when I post it so it will be a delightful surprise to them as well
Red: Yeah. Everyone should meet him when Ceaton does.
JL: [SPOILER SOOPER SEKRET LOVE INTEREST] telling Ceaton that he's so amazing he should have his own theme music. I agree!
JL: I wanted his brand of crazy in my life.Yessssss!
I don’t know if it can get any better than this story. I hope it can, because addiction, but these are some pretty big shoes to fill. This is my new favorite Calmes book. It reminded me why I love her stories so much, why I keep coming back to her whenever I’m down and in need of a pick-me-up or I’m just bored and need to get lost in a story. This is a multi re-read for sure. Go read the book, people!JL: Wait. Hold on just a doggone minute here…[HUGE SURPRISE AND SPOILING SPOILERY SPOILER!]
JL: Mind blown. Just fucking exploded. Holy shit!
Red: Okay... I was waiting for you to get to that part because I was all... Um... [SPOILER SPOILING AND BOILING!!!] And WTF? And how cool.
JL: [SPOILING THE SPOILING SO YOU HAVE TO READ TO KNOW THE SPOILS YOU’RE NOT BEING SPOILED]I'll say it again... HOLY SHIT!
Red: Right? How long has she had that move planned??? She is so fucking cool.
JL: She's brilliant is what she is! I'll have to do some research but I know for a fact [SPOILERS NOT BEING LEFT OUT TO GET SPOILED AND STINKY!]
JL: And in [NOT GONNA TELL YA]. And mentioned in the [YOU’LL SPOIL YOUR DINNER!]
JL: See???? Brilliant!
And lo, the Month of Mary was born. And everyone in the land rejoiced, shouting “May the Schwartz be with you!”Red: Time to read some books again. OMG. She is so good.
JL: Yes! Reread!OK, going to bed now.